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OMG West Loop!

from Metric System by Robbie Ellis

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Here’s your matcha flat white, and here’s your poppy seed and desiccated coconut donut.
Thanks, have a good one! … Aw, damn this is good! You wanna try?
Sure, you try some of mine.

Oh my god, this coffee.
Oh my god, this donut.
Oh my god, West Loop!
The greatest neighborhood on earth.
West Loop!
Located west of the Loop.

You can find Chicago’s most superb cuisine right here.
Seven dollars for a coffee. Thirteen dollars for a beer.
Randolph, Green and Halsted is a gastronomic sphere.
26 for bagels, lox, and capers and schmear!
Girl and the Goat, Little Goat, Duck Duck Goat, Sugar Goat,
To get these dining spots we sacrificed a baby goat.

West Loop!
We lived in Lake View in our twenties.
West Loop!
And in our thirties we live here.

I bought my condo in ’09, it’s now worth three times more.
And I bought mine in 2012, I’m richer than before.
I bought one on Friday at the local condo store.
There will never be another housing bubble.

Oh my god, West Loop!
It’s just a stroll across the river.
West Loop!
Where there are no cheap gyms.

What do you do? I work in social media.
I work at Google doing social media.
I work at McDonald’s.
Wow really?
At their new corporate headquarters.
Doing social media.
Oh my god, West Loop!

Oh my god your dog!
It’s a Labradoodle-dachshund cross.
Oh my god your dog!
It’s a Shih Tzu-Yorkshire terrier cross.
Oh my god your dog!
It’s a corgi-Shiba Inu cross.
Everybody has a dog. Everybody has a dog.
When we tell you everybody, what we mean is literally
Everybody gets a dog! Everybody gets a dog!
You get a dog! You get a dog! You get a dog!
We reference Oprah Winfrey cause she used to tape her show in
West Loop!

My name’s Eddie Radich, I got a meat-curing business in Fulton Market. Family’s been in the West Loop meat trade since 1922, fourth generation. The neighborhood’s not what it used to be. We got hipsters on their scooters wearing headphones with their podcasts...
(Hey, eyes up buddy!)
And here’s some now.
Okay, this location is fire!
It’s gonna be perfect for your small-batch doggie daycare startup.
Here’s an enormous venture capital check made out to “Man With An Accent”.
Well, guess I’m cashing out. Bye bye Chicago, hello Arizona!

Take over all of West Loop!
We’ve made it our part of Chicago.
West Loop!
Until we move to Humboldt Park.


from Metric System, released November 4, 2022
Robbie Ellis · lead vocals, keyboards
Liz Falstreau, Lisa Burton · co-lead vocals
Airan Wright · alto saxophone
Chip Aucoin, Ben Auxier, Alyssa Bailey, Keenan Camp, Jack Chylinski, Louie Cordon, Ashlee Hardgrave, Matt Keeley, Joelle Kross, Joelle Mendoza, Will Nicholson, Elizabeth Shuman, Jennifer Stuart, Weston Williams · crowd vocals

Music, lyrics and arrangement © Robbie Ellis (APRA) 2018-2022. Additional arrangements by Matt Griffo.

Lead vocals recorded by Matt Griffo at Chicago Recording Boutique.
Crowd vocals recorded by Julia A. Miller at Delmark Records, Chicago.
Edited by Robbie Ellis.
Mixed by Matt Griffo at Chicago Recording Boutique.


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Robbie Ellis Chicago, Illinois

Chicago-based New Zealander Robbie Ellis makes comedy songs. He also composes concert music; is a music director for improv and sketch; and presents classical music radio.

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