Testaments

from Metric System by Robbie Ellis

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lyrics

Welcome everyone, you’re at the New Faith Community Fellowship Assembly. I’m Pastor Chad, but you can call me Pastor C. Nice to... C... you, hehehehe. Here at the NFCFA we blend a 2,000-year-old religion with a modern friendly face, and right now, I’d like to rap about one of my friends.

Jesus is my closest friend,
There is nothing he can’t mend.
He can be your best friend too,
Always he’ll be there for you.
When you need him, he’s right there,
He can help you anywhere.
How is this a thing I know?
The New Testament says so.

(But the God of the Old Testament is vengeful.
Vengeful!)

When you are unwell and sick,
Jesus’ love is just the trick.
He can heal the lame and blind,
All because he’s good and kind.

(But God sends plagues unto the Earth
And everyone dies of lesions.
Lesions!)

Jesus wants to tell you guys
All are equal in his eyes...

(Except sodomites and unmarried women
And those who consume shellfish.
Shellfish!)

Doesn’t matter how you look...

(No!
God hates those who keep their hair unkempt
And those who wear mixed fibres.
Fibres!)

Jesus’ spirit sets you free...

(Slavery is kind of okay
In certain contexts.
Contexts!)

Faith is a complicated thing.

credits

from Metric System, released November 4, 2022
Robbie Ellis · lead vocals, organ, keyboards
Tage Larsen · trumpets
Gastón Rodella · trombones
José Ciccone · bass trombone
Victoria Moreira, Naomi Culp · violins
Susan Bengtson Price · violas
Hope Shepherd DeCelle · cellos
Emilse Rios · double bass
Jake Dewar · acoustic guitar, additional vocals
Chip Aucoin, Ben Auxier, Alyssa Bailey, Keenan Camp, Jack Chylinski, Louie Cordon, Ashlee Hardgrave, Matt Keeley, Joelle Kross, Joelle Mendoza, Will Nicholson, Elizabeth Shuman, Jennifer Stuart, Weston Williams · choir

Music, lyrics and arrangement © Robbie Ellis (APRA) 2018-2022.

Lead vocals and trumpets recorded by Matt Griffo at Chicago Recording Boutique.
Choir recorded by Julia A. Miller at Delmark Records, Chicago.
String quartet recorded by David Lopez at Gravity Studios, Chicago.
Bass trombone recorded by Gastón Rodella.
Edited by Robbie Ellis.
Mixed by Matt Griffo at Chicago Recording Boutique.

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Robbie Ellis Chicago, Illinois

Chicago-based New Zealander Robbie Ellis makes comedy songs. He also composes concert music; is a music director for improv and sketch; and presents classical music radio.

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